Thursday, 18 February 2016

REALLY BAD Trip And... Good Trip? All In One?

You can def have a bad trip smoking weed. Even a little bit of weed. I swear by kush but smoking too much marijuana or the strain that is not right for you can have its negative side effects. And they can be DRAMATIC. So I wanted to tell you about my bad trip. Well I ordered some chocolate kush from an online medical marijuana provider (got my green card and everything) and was really excited to try it out; so excited I decided to get my entire family involved (not knowing the worst day dream/nightmare will soon come knocking). I was laughing and force-feeding the marijuana-laced chocolate to my mom and dad.

It seemed super exciting at first: me, I was gonna get friggin high with my parents yo how dope is that? But then in attempt to persuade them to take more, I just kept eating and eating the chocolate not realizing that I was on the verge on FREAKING OUT in trippy dippy psychedelic land. And ohhhhh it was not good. Ever heard of the saying: "It is like hell on earth." Yeah that's exactly how it was. Well let me tell you how it all began. So I was still laughing, feeling the rush, high, excitable side of the weed and telling my parents to have more cause I wanted to see how they would look high. Around that time I started noticing bits and pieces - strips to be exact - of my vision peeling away. I was like WTF o.O this is when I stopped laughing and I was like "Dad... Dad.. I think something is happening or about to happen..." And I held on to the counter. Knowing what I know now about how CRUCIAL it is NOT to freak the freak out I would have done it differently but since I was a newbie to weed I was just like soooo paranoid I thought that I was gonna go crazy so I started... well... I made matters worse..

So my parents seeing me freak out started freaking out. My dad went to call the ambulance because all of a sudden I couldn't speak properly and I couldn't see them. I LEGIT. Could. Not. See. My parents who were like two inches away from me. My mom walked me over to the couch and had me lie down. At this point I could not even feel her hand touching me.

And here is where it gets scary!

Darkness. Imagine seeing just complete darkness. Imagine not being able to hear your parents clearly or feel them, and they are right beside you. Imagine only being able to see a purple cross in the form of a dim light far out in the distance in the dark void before you. Naturally... I thought I was dying. I voiced my concern to my parents and they were like Shelby no you are not dying and then I started getting really angry and saying BUT I AM I AM DYING FK FK F$%%! Then the next thing that came to my mind was going to hell. Now I started to really panic. Not only was I dying like this over some simple weed but I was going to be burning in flames for all eternity. I started to feel the heat and like almost the flames, the fire behind me. I started to feel like I was burning. Then I started seeing all these beams of lights flashing throughout the dark void that was my existence (all the while hearing the frantic shrill voice of my mother who was cradling me like a baby at this point). I prayed to God. I couldn't stop crying, praying to God, begging for forgiveness, pleading with him not to throw me to the flames, begging my parents to forgive me too, for all the naughty things I have done on this earth not listening to them etc.

It was like torture.... I felt like whatever I thought, no matter how small, God would be judging me, and that I was at risk of going to hell at any moment. It was like judgement day for me. Then I had this feeling, this sense, like God was telling me to just let go. To relax. Just go with whatever is happening to me. That he has forgiven me, that I have another chance or whatever and I could just breathe. And I started to breathe deeply and let go. I started to calm down. And as soon as that happened my vision started to come back like fitting puzzle pieces together. I saw the archway leading into the lobby. I saw the paramedics. Finally I felt safe... And now.... the good stuff started to begin. HAHA it was so friggin awesome. Anyway I got the impression that I was a child of God and that NO I was not going to hell that I was going to HEAVEN! And I started seeing this bright white light now (again I reverted back into the trip, only this time it was blissful because I was calm). I was hearing angel voices and it was like they were calling me, cheering me on, telling me that I had a place with them one day. I saw myself glowing. I saw a more beautiful version of myself with wings and bright floral tattoos....

I was bald for some reason LOL. I was naked and yes I was in heaven and I was just a giggly child again and God and his angels accepted me for me. It was so beautiful. My dad said at this point I was giggling wildly and flapping my palms like I was doggy paddling. No one knew what was going on in my head. My eyes were open. But I remember they felt shut. But I did have glimpses of the paramedics and I thought they were angels and I though wow the world is beautiful. It was definitely life changing. But yeah be careful with that sht. Haha lol.

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